Life with Two Kids is Scary
Sunday, November 7, 2010
When my first son was born, I remember thinking, “this isn’t so hard.” Perhaps it was because I was so bombarded with negative expectations that I was surprised at how much easier life ended up being. Sure, I was sleep deprived, but it wasn’t like I had any other responsibilities to tend to. Hubby and I had plenty of time to run to the store for extra supplies, food or little incidentals.
When we were expecting baby number two I knew there was no need to worry. After all, I never had any problems with the first one; what could be so different? Turns out, it’s a lot different! When he arrived, I was woefully unprepared and those trips to the store weren’t so easy any more. Hubby and I were beyond exhausted and nobody had any time or energy to do anything. If it weren’t for my mom, I’m not sure how we would have survived the first week. I was beside myself. Why hadn’t I stocked up? Where were all the baby supplies I needed? How was I going to make a trip to the store with a newborn and a three year old? Does my husband really need to go to work and leave me all alone? Who the hell let me have another kid…I obviously don’t know what I’m doing!
I got off easy for the first month because technically I wasn’t allowed to lift my 3-year-old (because of the c-section), and that meant I had to rely on friends and family to take him to preschool and run errands for me. However, eventually my body recovered, and it was time to take on the responsibility of my two kids. My older son is a bit of a handful and tends to run…so my fears were slightly elevated. What if he took off and I’d have to chase after him with the baby? What if he threw a fit and started rolling around on the floor while I was tending to the baby? These were real fears. But as real as they were, I just couldn’t stay in the house all day. (Or else I might be forced to do laundry or something.)
My first venture was to preschool and that proved to be fairly easy. I made sure to park close to the door and knew that as soon as we got inside, we were safe. My second attempt was a little more difficult…and scary. The 3-year-old had a doctor’s appointment at the local hospital and as much as I wanted to ask hubby to stay home with the baby, I knew I had to handle this myself. First I had to decide if I wanted to put the baby in the carrier and the 3-year-old in the stroller, or put the baby in the stroller and hold hands with the 3-year-old. Each scenario had its pros and cons. Having the 3-year-old in the stroller meant I had complete control over him and didn’t have to worry about misbehavior. But, what if he had to potty? Or what if he wouldn’t get in the stroller and I was forced to wrestle him? Could I manage such a feat while the baby was strapped to my chest? I just wasn’t sure. It ended up being a game-time decision when he informed me that he had to pee just as I pulled into the parking lot. OK, then, it would have to be baby in stroller and holding hands with the 3-year-old. We were already late, so I’d have to hustle.
I got the baby out first, next was the 3-year-old and we started walking. I was proud that I remembered the diaper bag (something I had forgotten many times as a rookie mom), but I was a little discouraged when I realized how cold it was outside and the lack of extra clothing I had for the kids. We would just have to run and hope we wouldn’t come across any little old ladies who’d pass judgment. (you know the type!) Luckily the 3-year-old behaved rather well and held my hand the whole time. We had a little mishap with improper aiming in the bathroom that required a change of pants. And, unfortunately, a change of pants was the one thing I didn’t have. Doh! So, he had to go with wet pants for a bit. Oh well, not the first time for that, and probably won’t be the last either…at least everybody was safe.
And, with that under my belt, I was a little more comfortable trying again. This time I remembered a change of pants…and it turns out that I can help the 3-year-old potty while the baby is strapped to my chest. Who knew?!?
Great article that brought me back about a year to when number two was born! Thanks!
Yes, great article!!
Great article Rebeca! It’s funny how different people’s experiences are. I felt the opposite from you. When i had my first baby i remember thinking- ok i’m going to shower, grab a bite and then nap. Alas the piercing sound of a new born wail brought me back to reality. I vividly recall thinking “if i saved my receipt i wonder if they will take him back?!” (Tongue in cheek of course.) Congratulations on overcoming this passage of parenthood. There will be more for all of us in our various stages. But, one thing we can always be thankful for is each other.